Illini 4000

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What am I riding for?

This is my first post. It was supposed to be written yesterday. But I was too tired. Excuse! I know, but whatever. One of the founders of our organization came by the day before and talked to us. He said one of his biggest regrets was not journaling his experiences along the trip. Honestly, I haven't been doing much of journaling since the beginning. Should I start doing it now such that I remember some days more clearly than others? I don't want an incomplete memory. Or should I just rely on my brain and risk having a not so vivid memory? What details will I remember and what are the things I will forget 10 years down the road when I look back in life? I have no idea! Dilemma.But here I am writing my first post. It may well be my last! We started our ride yesterday with strong emotions in our hearts. Megan's mosher was indeed impactful and inspirational! She had us say our reasons for joining the ride. We reconnected with our cause. Everyone rides for different people and different purposes. But we are all doing it for a great cause. Some ride for loved ones who have lost their lives to cancer. Some ride for dear ones who are in the midst of their battle against cancer. What Conor said is true. We are riding for hope. When there's hope, there's faith. When there's faith, there's a way! Hope is what makes things happen. I know these are big words and it's easier said than done. I just hope I could remind myself of this whenever I feel despondent.Before yesterday, I rode for family and friends who lost their lives to cancer and also for myself as I see it as a challenge. But since yesterday, I found more purposes for the ride.  I ride for my team mates (it's their persistence and optimism that make me realize the greater purpose in the ride). I ride for their loved ones. I ride for hope. As I sit in front of the laptop and reflect on what everyone said yesterday morning, I think I'm glad I realized the true reasons which I'm supposed to be riding for. I also have a fear. I fear for losing my family and friends to cancer, although currently they are fine. I think it's also the fear of loss that makes me wanna ride. But I wish my hope overrides my fear.