The Tale of The Little Spandex Wearers

This is a story told by some of the greatest Americans who ever lived.

George Washington = GW

Thomas Jefferson = TJ

Theodore Roosevelt = TR

Abraham Lincoln = AL

GW: Yawwwwwwwwwwwwwnnnnnnnnnnnnn

AL: You alright there George?

GW: Yes, just a bit tired Abe. It’s 8 am after all, and I got a terrible night’s sleep.

TJ: I wonder why……

TR: Odd, I slept like a baby.

TJ: YOU ALWAYS SLEEP LIKE A BABY, ROO.

TR: It’s not my fault I snore.

GW: Boys, boys settle down.

AL: Wait a second, do you see that?

GW, TJ, TR: What?

AL: I think…I think there are some cyclists coming our way through the Black Hills National Park.

TR: Surely, there would be no one stupid enough to try to climb up this way. That is nearly, mmmmm, nearly….how high up are we?

GW: 5000 feet.

TR: 5000 feet? Are you kidding me?

TJ: Can’t you hear the man? I know I’m between you two, but he’s right here. You really need to get your hearing checked.

TR: And how am I supposed to do that? I suppose I will just ask someone to sculpt some legs for me so I can walk down to the local hospital, huh? Really good idea Jeffy.

AL: Shut up you two. They are coming closer.

GW: NOOOOOOOOOO, why would they be biking up that 2 mile hill. We really aren’t that big of a deal. Why does everyone always want to see us?

AL: Now, George, you of all people should know that because of us and the actions we made directly affect these people’s lives. We kind of are a big deal, for some people.

TJ: It should be every person.

AL: Yes, yes, yes Thomas. I know, but that is what is beautiful about America, people have the freedom to believe in whatever they want here.

TJ: Whatever…..

GW: O my, they arrived already! How are they so quick? Look at all those little tight shirt, spandexed people and their bicycles.

TR: I see some pretty good mustaches too. 

TJ: Quickly, get in picture position.

TR: You are so stupid. We are always ready for pictures. WE CAN’T MOVE.

GW: Shut up and smile you two.

(1/2 an hour passes by)

AL: That was quick. Where are they going now, George?

GW: It looks like…..through the Mt. Rushmore National Park.

TJ: Naturally…who wouldn’t want to see our backwoods?

GW: And now they passed the sculpture of Wounded Kneee.

TR: O, I can’t wait til his sculpture is finished! Finaly, we will have a neighbor!

GW: Oof, more hills. Not as bad before, but still, I would not want to be them.

AL: I can see them leaving South Dakota now! I will miss them. They seemed like such nice and honest kids, and I can appreciate that.

GW: Very funny, Abe.

TR: And now they are getting food! What kind people there are in Newcastle, WY.

TJ: Pamido, Hopps, Pizza Hut, and Taco John all donated food, maybe I was wrong about the people in America.

AL: That’s more like it, Thomas. Wow, it’s already bedtime.

GW: Good luck little spandex wearers! Good night!

THE END

*This blog entry is based on a true story

Comments (3)
  • Gayle Winters says:

    LOL!!! That was very entertaining! THANKS for sharing and enjoy the second half of your journey. Pedal and stay safe.

  • Nancy Replogle says:

    Very creative!! What a great way to commemorate the Illini 4000 visit with four of our nation’s greatest leaders at Mount Rushmore. They would be proud of you!

  • evolkman Erik Volkman says:

    So, question is, did you stop at the Quizno’s in Custer that I apparently always talk about?

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